LT Features

Married and Buried Way back in September I was lucky enough to go to the Buried press junket and hover in the corner breathing heavily while Derek interviewed the film’s star, Ryan Reynolds, and Director, Rodrigo Cortes.  It was the perfect day in every way but one… although obviously I could feel the sexual tension in the air and Ry-Ry kept winking at me (or twitching, whatever), he hadn’t formally announced his divorce from Black Widow yet and thus I, being the lady that I am, didn’t feel comfortable putting the moves on him.  But now the stars have aligned and I have a second chance!  Buriedpremieres on EPIX this Sunday and you can bet your bottom dollar that I will be transporting myself into that coffin with Ryan during his time of need.  Sure, a stranger teleporting herself into the ground with some romantic candles, homemade trail mix, and a camel back filled with margaritas might not make total sense to the storyline of the film, but true love knows no bounds. To call Ryan the “star” of the film is really doing him a disservice – he is literally the only actor.  Unlike other single-character films like 127 Hours (they threw in some flashbacks and a couple other hikers) or Castaway (Wilson the volleyball deserved an Oscar if you ask me), Ryan is the only face we see.  And what a hunky face it is.  His character goes through a broad arc of feelings – fear, anger, determination, despair, and confusion… kind of like my feelings on an average date.   You know how sometimes movie studios will auction off costumes or sets from films?  Well, believe you me, if this dang box becomes available I will sell all my worldly possessions to own it and sleep in it every night.  Creepy, yes, but also such a great space saver!  Be sure to look at our movie page where you can see our interview with Ryan and Rodrigo where they discuss the Hitchcockian elements of the film (the constant, elevated suspense will get your heart pounding), the difficulties of filming in one spot with one man, and – best of all – video of when I trapped Derek (the other man in my life) in his own box at Comic Con.  Whoops! L.T.

Married and Buried

Way back in September I was lucky enough to go to the Buried press junket and hover in the corner breathing heavily while Derek interviewed the film’s star, Ryan Reynolds, and Director, Rodrigo Cortes.  It was the perfect day in every way but one… although obviously I could feel the sexual tension in the air and Ry-Ry kept winking at me (or twitching, whatever), he hadn’t formally announced his divorce from Black Widow yet and thus I, being the lady that I am, didn’t feel comfortable putting the moves on him.  But now the stars have aligned and I have a second chance! 

Buriedpremieres on EPIX this Sunday and you can bet your bottom dollar that I will be transporting myself into that coffin with Ryan during his time of need.  Sure, a stranger teleporting herself into the ground with some romantic candles, homemade trail mix, and a camel back filled with margaritas might not make total sense to the storyline of the film, but true love knows no bounds.

To call Ryan the “star” of the film is really doing him a disservice – he is literally the only actor.  Unlike other single-character films like 127 Hours (they threw in some flashbacks and a couple other hikers) or Castaway (Wilson the volleyball deserved an Oscar if you ask me), Ryan is the only face we see.  And what a hunky face it is.  His character goes through a broad arc of feelings – fear, anger, determination, despair, and confusion… kind of like my feelings on an average date.  

You know how sometimes movie studios will auction off costumes or sets from films?  Well, believe you me, if this dang box becomes available I will sell all my worldly possessions to own it and sleep in it every night.  Creepy, yes, but also such a great space saver! 

Be sure to look at our movie page where you can see our interview with Ryan and Rodrigo where they discuss the Hitchcockian elements of the film (the constant, elevated suspense will get your heart pounding), the difficulties of filming in one spot with one man, and – best of all – video of when I trapped Derek (the other man in my life) in his own box at Comic Con.  Whoops!

L.T.

I Need a Hero Ahh, yes, finally, we’re only a day away from my favorite thing on the planet – government mandated days of rest!  Memorial Day is particularly fabulous because, although it is really about recognizing all of the soldiers who have given their lives for America, it’s also about hot dogs, hammocks and vodka-soaked watermelon (at my house at least).  I wish that there were some soldiers around here for me to hug and thank in person, but I’ll have to settle for the Hollywood version of a hero.  What’s that you say?  You want to see some Hollywood heroes too?  Well look no further!  Seriously, stop looking because it’s right here on EPIX.  We’re calling it Heroes Unlimited and it’s just that; a slew of heroes smooshed into a daylong marathon of action flicks.  We’ve got The Expendables: The Extended Cut(never before seen!), Inferno: The Making of The Expendables, Kick-Ass, Iron Man 2, The Last Airbender, and G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra.  And believe-you-me my friend, if you haven’t seen these movies yet (or even if you’ve just seen the regular ol’ movie theater version of The Expendables) you’ll want to ditch the BBQ and saddle up to your screen and see what you’ve been missing.  Sly Stallone, Chloe Grace Moretz, Robert Downey Jr., Dev Patel and Channing Tatum might seem like a motley crew of actors, but after you watch their films you’ll realize that together they’re an unstoppable force.  They’re all such bad-asses it makes me wonder what kind of crazy feats they would be capable of if assembled together in real life.  Coincidence that the names of the secret SEAL team that killed Osama bin Laden have not been revealed??… I think not.  But before the marathon can begin, our legal team wants me to add a few words.  EPIX is not responsible for any injuries you may cause to yourself or others while out fighting crime.  Sure, you’ll get inspired after seeing these movies and ask yourself “hey – what can I do to be a hero in my neighborhood?”  The answer to that query is to volunteer at a soup kitchen, be a crossing guard, or – if you’re feeling adventurous – offer half of your sandwich to the rabid squirrel starring you down.    Do not try to build your own Iron Mansuit and teach some bad guys a lesson.  Trust me, I’ve tried it and the results have been less than stellar. So slap on your spandex jumpsuit (I know you have one) and watch some heroes with me on Monday.  Then leave a comment below letting me know who your favorite hero is and why.  And yes, the camera guy from Inferno is a perfectly good answer.  L.T.

I Need a Hero

Ahh, yes, finally, we’re only a day away from my favorite thing on the planet – government mandated days of rest!  Memorial Day is particularly fabulous because, although it is really about recognizing all of the soldiers who have given their lives for America, it’s also about hot dogs, hammocks and vodka-soaked watermelon (at my house at least).  I wish that there were some soldiers around here for me to hug and thank in person, but I’ll have to settle for the Hollywood version of a hero.  What’s that you say?  You want to see some Hollywood heroes too?  Well look no further!  Seriously, stop looking because it’s right here on EPIX.  We’re calling it Heroes Unlimited and it’s just that; a slew of heroes smooshed into a daylong marathon of action flicks. 

We’ve got The Expendables: The Extended Cut(never before seen!), Inferno: The Making of The Expendables, Kick-Ass, Iron Man 2, The Last Airbender, and G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra.  And believe-you-me my friend, if you haven’t seen these movies yet (or even if you’ve just seen the regular ol’ movie theater version of The Expendables) you’ll want to ditch the BBQ and saddle up to your screen and see what you’ve been missing.  Sly Stallone, Chloe Grace Moretz, Robert Downey Jr., Dev Patel and Channing Tatum might seem like a motley crew of actors, but after you watch their films you’ll realize that together they’re an unstoppable force.  They’re all such bad-asses it makes me wonder what kind of crazy feats they would be capable of if assembled together in real life.  Coincidence that the names of the secret SEAL team that killed Osama bin Laden have not been revealed??… I think not. 

But before the marathon can begin, our legal team wants me to add a few words.  EPIX is not responsible for any injuries you may cause to yourself or others while out fighting crime.  Sure, you’ll get inspired after seeing these movies and ask yourself “hey – what can I do to be a hero in my neighborhood?”  The answer to that query is to volunteer at a soup kitchen, be a crossing guard, or – if you’re feeling adventurous – offer half of your sandwich to the rabid squirrel starring you down.    Do not try to build your own Iron Mansuit and teach some bad guys a lesson.  Trust me, I’ve tried it and the results have been less than stellar.

So slap on your spandex jumpsuit (I know you have one) and watch some heroes with me on Monday.  Then leave a comment below letting me know who your favorite hero is and why.  And yes, the camera guy from Inferno is a perfectly good answer. 

L.T.

An Open Letter to Ahhhhnold Umm… hey Arnold.  Not sure how to tell you this but I think you’ve lost your dang mind.  I mean, really, what is going on over there?  Have you been hanging out with Jesse James?  Thank goodness I’m a speed-reader because frankly I’m not sure how I could keep up with all your craziness if I weren’t.  First I read you’re getting divorced – my condolences – then I see that it’s because you had an affair.  You should definitely be publically shamed for your inability to keep it in your spandex shorts, but a celebrity having an affair (especially one in politics and double especially one who lives in California) happens about as frequently as my feeding times so I cant say I was surprised.  What did surprise me, however, was that you were dumb enough to freestyle it and had a kid – POSSIBLY TWO KIDS – with these women.  I know English isn’t your first language (heck, are you even fluent?) but you should at least be able to read the instructions on a condom wrapper.  And even if you can’t, they’re pretty self-explanatory.  A one-night stand, fine; an affair, shame on you; having a kid, bad news; having ANOTHER child with yet another woman… you have got to be kidding me.  But the worst part of the entire shebang (emphasis on the ‘bang’) is that you didn’t acknowledge these children for almost 15 years.  A couple bottles of wine and a new pool boy and Maria will be fine – these two kids are the real victims.  Bottom line – you give me a bad case of the yuckies. Love, LT! Moving forward – a couple notes.  One, does the Governator’s clear ability to impregnate anyone in his path debunk the rumor that steroids affect a man’s fertility?  Two, who wouldda thunk that anyone could make John Edwards and Elliot Spitzer look relatively normal?  Three, lets remember Arnold for the legacy he would have left behind had this last week not happened.  Yes, I know - that’s kind of like saying, “whenever I think of Charlie Sheen, I think about how great he was in Platoon!” but we have to try to look past Arnold’s indiscretions in the name of entertainment.  Pumping Iron, The Running Man, Raw Deal, The Expendables, The Terminatorand he’s greatest role ever as Detective John Kimble in Kindergarten Cop – these are all great movies, people!  So lets take a moment to thank Arnold for all he has done for Hollywood (both as an actor and as the Governor) and, more importantly, let’s thank him for not impregnating us. L.T.

An Open Letter to Ahhhhnold

Umm… hey Arnold.  Not sure how to tell you this but I think you’ve lost your dang mind.  I mean, really, what is going on over there?  Have you been hanging out with Jesse James?  Thank goodness I’m a speed-reader because frankly I’m not sure how I could keep up with all your craziness if I weren’t.  First I read you’re getting divorced – my condolences – then I see that it’s because you had an affair.  You should definitely be publically shamed for your inability to keep it in your spandex shorts, but a celebrity having an affair (especially one in politics and double especially one who lives in California) happens about as frequently as my feeding times so I cant say I was surprised.  What did surprise me, however, was that you were dumb enough to freestyle it and had a kid – POSSIBLY TWO KIDS – with these women. 

I know English isn’t your first language (heck, are you even fluent?) but you should at least be able to read the instructions on a condom wrapper.  And even if you can’t, they’re pretty self-explanatory.  A one-night stand, fine; an affair, shame on you; having a kid, bad news; having ANOTHER child with yet another woman… you have got to be kidding me.  But the worst part of the entire shebang (emphasis on the ‘bang’) is that you didn’t acknowledge these children for almost 15 years.  A couple bottles of wine and a new pool boy and Maria will be fine – these two kids are the real victims.  Bottom line – you give me a bad case of the yuckies.

Love, LT!

Moving forward – a couple notes.  One, does the Governator’s clear ability to impregnate anyone in his path debunk the rumor that steroids affect a man’s fertility?  Two, who wouldda thunk that anyone could make John Edwards and Elliot Spitzer look relatively normal?  Three, lets remember Arnold for the legacy he would have left behind had this last week not happened.  Yes, I know - that’s kind of like saying, “whenever I think of Charlie Sheen, I think about how great he was in Platoon!” but we have to try to look past Arnold’s indiscretions in the name of entertainment.  Pumping Iron, The Running Man, Raw Deal, The Expendables, The Terminatorand he’s greatest role ever as Detective John Kimble in Kindergarten Cop – these are all great movies, people!  So lets take a moment to thank Arnold for all he has done for Hollywood (both as an actor and as the Governor) and, more importantly, let’s thank him for not impregnating us.

L.T.

Hammer Time It seems like just yesterday I was at Comic-Con with my betrothed admiring the gargantuan, gilded set of Thorand tomorrow the wait will be over – the film opens and I’ll finally be able to see that set in action, hopefully with Chris Hemsworth’s fine tush walking all over it.  The movie also stars Anthony Hopkins who rocks a golden eye patch that evokes my love for pirates, which, frankly, I appreciate.  Rounding out the cast is my gal pal Natalie Portman but that shouldn’t be much of a surprise since she has been in every film released this year.  Literally every film; that statement is not an exaggeration at all. I hate to admit this, and if anyone dares bring it up later I’ll claim that the Fan Boy spirit briefly possessed me, but I’m actually a sucker for all things Marvel.  I love the idea of heroes and everything they symbolize.  Thor is an especially amazing character because once his eye-patch-wearing dad casts him down to Earth he is forced to become a great man and can then become a great hero.  His journey is kind of inspirational in a comicy-way.   The story of Thor really reminds me of Greek mythology too, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves.  I can feel my inner nerd busting out of my cool shell and I need to rein it in.  So, to recap: the film comes out tomorrow but in the meantime you must – simply MUST – look at our movie page and see the slew of extras we have.  Star interviews from the premier’s red carpet, press junket highlights, movie clips, behind the scenes peeks into the making of the movie and… the one and only STAN LEE, also known as the man I would dump my boyfriend like a bad habit for.  Yeah, it would be a May-December type of relationship but whatever – I’ve had a thing for Stan since his cameo in Mallrats circa 1995.  Sick, I know. One final note – how fast do you think you could assemble an entire room filled with IKEA furniture if you had Thor’s hammer?  Just sayin’. L.T.

Hammer Time

It seems like just yesterday I was at Comic-Con with my betrothed admiring the gargantuan, gilded set of Thorand tomorrow the wait will be over – the film opens and I’ll finally be able to see that set in action, hopefully with Chris Hemsworth’s fine tush walking all over it.  The movie also stars Anthony Hopkins who rocks a golden eye patch that evokes my love for pirates, which, frankly, I appreciate.  Rounding out the cast is my gal pal Natalie Portman but that shouldn’t be much of a surprise since she has been in every film released this year.  Literally every film; that statement is not an exaggeration at all.

I hate to admit this, and if anyone dares bring it up later I’ll claim that the Fan Boy spirit briefly possessed me, but I’m actually a sucker for all things Marvel.  I love the idea of heroes and everything they symbolize.  Thor is an especially amazing character because once his eye-patch-wearing dad casts him down to Earth he is forced to become a great man and can then become a great hero.  His journey is kind of inspirational in a comicy-way.   The story of Thor really reminds me of Greek mythology too, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves.  I can feel my inner nerd busting out of my cool shell and I need to rein it in. 

So, to recap: the film comes out tomorrow but in the meantime you must – simply MUST – look at our movie page and see the slew of extras we have.  Star interviews from the premier’s red carpet, press junket highlights, movie clips, behind the scenes peeks into the making of the movie and… the one and only STAN LEE, also known as the man I would dump my boyfriend like a bad habit for.  Yeah, it would be a May-December type of relationship but whatever – I’ve had a thing for Stan since his cameo in Mallrats circa 1995.  Sick, I know.

One final note – how fast do you think you could assemble an entire room filled with IKEA furniture if you had Thor’s hammer?  Just sayin’.

L.T.

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Happy Bad Ass Mother’s Day Mother’s Day is just around the corner and I can’t think of a more appropriate way to celebrate than by settling in for a sweet movie marathon of flicks that star some real Bad Ass Mothers.  On second thought, I guess a more appropriate way to celebrate would be to take your mother out to brunch of send her a nice e-card (heck, maybe even spring for the tangible Hallmark variety!) but being appropriate was never really my thing.  I like to thank my mom for all she has done for me on my birthday – the day she “brought in into the world” or, more accurately, the day I ripped myself free from her body, against her will.  When you look at it that way, birthdays really should be about celebrating your mom and Mother’s Day should be about celebrating Arnold Schwarzenegger.  AmIright?? Our “Bad Ass Mother” Movie Collection features The Terminator, Harry Brown, From Paris With Love,Gamerand Crank: High Voltage.  Or, as I like to call it, The Anthology of Films that Best Represent the Life and Times of L.T.  Allow me to take a moment and highlight the similarities between each film and my own dramatic adventures.  Arnold told everyone “I’ll be back” in the film that really kicked his career into high gear.  Similarly, I told everyone in my office “I’ll be back” after I went to grab lunch; a deep-fried-carb-loaded lunch that later rendered me unable to actually kick anything.  Harry Brown stars Michael Caine as a man who takes the teenage violence that is running rampant in his community into his own hands.  Just like Michael, I too decided to put a stop to my community’s growing noise problem and took it upon myself to slip notes into my neighbor’s mailboxes when I felt their music was too loud.  That’ll teach ‘em! Jonathan Rhys Meyers has to carry around a vase in To Paris With Love because of it’s unique composition and I had to carry around a vase when I moved from my last apartment because, let’s face it, sometimes moving men don’t handle everything with care even when marked FRAGILE.  Gamer is about a future where videogames have evolved into real-life manhunt (kind of like The Running Man) and that’s just like my life because after playing “Order Up” on my Wii for a few consecutive days I decided to enroll in culinary school.  I wish this little tidbit was a joke but it’s not. Crank is an easy one – Jason Statham attaches jumper cables to his nipple and tongue and so do I!  But then again, who doesn’t?! If you want to mix and match a traditional Mother’s Day with an EPIX Mother’s Day, you could always watch these movies with your mom.  Ta-da!  Compromise made. L.T. P.S. Congratulations to Prince Will.i.am and Kate Middleton!  I’m sure your ceremony was lovely but you’ve got nothing on the nuptials of the one and only Derek and yours truly.   

Happy Bad Ass Mother’s Day

Mother’s Day is just around the corner and I can’t think of a more appropriate way to celebrate than by settling in for a sweet movie marathon of flicks that star some real Bad Ass Mothers.  On second thought, I guess a more appropriate way to celebrate would be to take your mother out to brunch of send her a nice e-card (heck, maybe even spring for the tangible Hallmark variety!) but being appropriate was never really my thing.  I like to thank my mom for all she has done for me on my birthday – the day she “brought in into the world” or, more accurately, the day I ripped myself free from her body, against her will.  When you look at it that way, birthdays really should be about celebrating your mom and Mother’s Day should be about celebrating Arnold Schwarzenegger.  AmIright??

Our “Bad Ass Mother” Movie Collection features The Terminator, Harry Brown, From Paris With Love,Gamerand Crank: High Voltage.  Or, as I like to call it, The Anthology of Films that Best Represent the Life and Times of L.T.  Allow me to take a moment and highlight the similarities between each film and my own dramatic adventures. 

Arnold told everyone “I’ll be back” in the film that really kicked his career into high gear.  Similarly, I told everyone in my office “I’ll be back” after I went to grab lunch; a deep-fried-carb-loaded lunch that later rendered me unable to actually kick anything.  Harry Brown stars Michael Caine as a man who takes the teenage violence that is running rampant in his community into his own hands.  Just like Michael, I too decided to put a stop to my community’s growing noise problem and took it upon myself to slip notes into my neighbor’s mailboxes when I felt their music was too loud.  That’ll teach ‘em!

Jonathan Rhys Meyers has to carry around a vase in To Paris With Love because of it’s unique composition and I had to carry around a vase when I moved from my last apartment because, let’s face it, sometimes moving men don’t handle everything with care even when marked FRAGILE.  Gamer is about a future where videogames have evolved into real-life manhunt (kind of like The Running Man) and that’s just like my life because after playing “Order Up” on my Wii for a few consecutive days I decided to enroll in culinary school.  I wish this little tidbit was a joke but it’s not.

Crank is an easy one – Jason Statham attaches jumper cables to his nipple and tongue and so do I!  But then again, who doesn’t?!

If you want to mix and match a traditional Mother’s Day with an EPIX Mother’s Day, you could always watch these movies with your mom.  Ta-da!  Compromise made.

L.T.

P.S. Congratulations to Prince Will.i.am and Kate Middleton!  I’m sure your ceremony was lovely but you’ve got nothing on the nuptials of the one and only Derek and yours truly.   

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Other Than That Mrs. Lincoln, How Was the Play? Occasionally the planets align and something that I happen to take a natural liking to becomes popular with mainstream culture.  For example – I love a nice loose-fitting pant.  I often wear them in the privacy of my own home whilst binge eating and now, thanks to simply changing their name from “fatty fatty boom boom time pants” to “harem pants,” it’s suddenly socially acceptable to wear them outside.  Ditto for my favorite old-lady classic, the housecoat, which now due to divine intervention, is considered borderline trendy when you synch it at the waist, say it’s “vintage” and mumble something about an Olsen twin.  The key is that you can neither be rocking slippers nor shuffling down the street with rollers in your hair at the same time as wearing said housecoat or you’ll be revealed as a style imposter. I also enjoy reading much more than the average person and now it’s cool thanks Oprah’s book Club…  Let me re-phrase: I enjoy staying in on Saturday nights to read much more than the average mid-twenties gal.  Thank goodness I’m allergic to cats or I would clutching a one-way ticket to cat lady land.  But affinity for felines or not, some would argue it’s cool to be into books.  And the “some” I’m referring to is, of course, my mother and my imaginary friends.  The L.T. As Taste Maker Phenomenon (or LTATMP as the experts call it for short) could also be seen when I said, sometime around 1999, “Hey people, stripes are cool!  Celine Dion is cool!  History is cool!”  Then, lo and behold, J.Crew grows an empire based on nautical looks, Celine gets a ninety-year contract pounding her chest in Vegas, and finally Robert Redford directs a historical drama.  See, there was an EPIX tie-in just waiting to bust it’s way through the two paragraphs of utter bologna above.  The Conspirator is the kind of movie I would make if anyone gave a damn about the kind of movie a housecoat-wearing nerd would want to make.  It’s a historical film, (Earth to screenwriters – some of the best material can be found in a 4th grade text book), but has an all-star cast, which is clearly the best of both worlds.  Robin Wright, James McAvoy, Evan Rachel Wood, Kevin Kline and Justin Long are just a few of the many stars.  The Mac guy (and Drew Barrymore’s ex) is pretty cool but he is topped by Jim True-Frost, an actor who hasn’t been in a big blockbuster since the late 90’s but has such an exceptional double last name that he earns top billing.  The film is about President Lincoln’s assassination and the no-good-dirty-rotten-scoundrels, scallywags and menaces to society that plotted it.  Yup, it wasn’t just John Wilkes Booth who did the deed – many people, including a woman, were charged with planning the attack and ruining a perfectly lovely off-Broadway rendition of “Jersey Boys.”  Ok, that last part was historically inaccurate – the Lincolns were actually going to see “Mamma Mia!” The film is released today – check it out and leave a comment below telling me what you thought.  Think Redford purposefully coincided the release date with taxes being due in an attempt to play into everyone’s love/hate relationship with the government?  In the mean time, be sure to look at our movie page for the entire collection of behind the scenes clips you can’t find anywhere else. L.T. 

Other Than That Mrs. Lincoln, How Was the Play?

Occasionally the planets align and something that I happen to take a natural liking to becomes popular with mainstream culture.  For example – I love a nice loose-fitting pant.  I often wear them in the privacy of my own home whilst binge eating and now, thanks to simply changing their name from “fatty fatty boom boom time pants” to “harem pants,” it’s suddenly socially acceptable to wear them outside.  Ditto for my favorite old-lady classic, the housecoat, which now due to divine intervention, is considered borderline trendy when you synch it at the waist, say it’s “vintage” and mumble something about an Olsen twin.  The key is that you can neither be rocking slippers nor shuffling down the street with rollers in your hair at the same time as wearing said housecoat or you’ll be revealed as a style imposter.

I also enjoy reading much more than the average person and now it’s cool thanks Oprah’s book Club…  Let me re-phrase: I enjoy staying in on Saturday nights to read much more than the average mid-twenties gal.  Thank goodness I’m allergic to cats or I would clutching a one-way ticket to cat lady land.  But affinity for felines or not, some would argue it’s cool to be into books.  And the “some” I’m referring to is, of course, my mother and my imaginary friends. 

The L.T. As Taste Maker Phenomenon (or LTATMP as the experts call it for short) could also be seen when I said, sometime around 1999, “Hey people, stripes are cool!  Celine Dion is cool!  History is cool!”  Then, lo and behold, J.Crew grows an empire based on nautical looks, Celine gets a ninety-year contract pounding her chest in Vegas, and finally Robert Redford directs a historical drama.  See, there was an EPIX tie-in just waiting to bust it’s way through the two paragraphs of utter bologna above. 

The Conspirator is the kind of movie I would make if anyone gave a damn about the kind of movie a housecoat-wearing nerd would want to make.  It’s a historical film, (Earth to screenwriters – some of the best material can be found in a 4th grade text book), but has an all-star cast, which is clearly the best of both worlds.  Robin Wright, James McAvoy, Evan Rachel Wood, Kevin Kline and Justin Long are just a few of the many stars.  The Mac guy (and Drew Barrymore’s ex) is pretty cool but he is topped by Jim True-Frost, an actor who hasn’t been in a big blockbuster since the late 90’s but has such an exceptional double last name that he earns top billing. 

The film is about President Lincoln’s assassination and the no-good-dirty-rotten-scoundrels, scallywags and menaces to society that plotted it.  Yup, it wasn’t just John Wilkes Booth who did the deed – many people, including a woman, were charged with planning the attack and ruining a perfectly lovely off-Broadway rendition of “Jersey Boys.”  Ok, that last part was historically inaccurate – the Lincolns were actually going to see “Mamma Mia!”

The film is released today – check it out and leave a comment below telling me what you thought.  Think Redford purposefully coincided the release date with taxes being due in an attempt to play into everyone’s love/hate relationship with the government? 

In the mean time, be sure to look at our movie page for the entire collection of behind the scenes clips you can’t find anywhere else.

L.T. 

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It’s MY Turn (Said in Creepy Black Swan Voice) About three months ago I left New York to go on an adventure.  I imagined myself starring in my own coming-of-age movie that involved long road trips (kind of like Thelma and Louisebut without the whole murder/suicide thing) and the occasional rugged man who would help me fix the flat tires that inevitably accompany cross-country journeys.   I figured I would be meeting new people, trying new things and would eventually find my true calling.  Being that I had no idea what that calling was, my luggage was similar to an abandoned costume chest you might find on an old movie set.  I have pirate shirts for my sailing adventures, hiking boots for my 127 Hours–inspired excursions and an extensive spandex artillery just in case my “true calling” turns out to be as a crime fighting superhero.  Now that it’s my turn to be the heroine I’m discovering that my role isn’t fully developed; I’m a little all-over-the-place.  One second I want to be a professional athlete and then the next I’m watching a late-night infomercial and seriously considering purchasing a portable deep fryer.  Sometimes I want to be this strong, independent woman and other times I want to wake up to a letter from Columbia Presbyterian Hospital saying there was a terrible mix-up 25 years ago and I was actually switched at birth.  The hospital is flying me to my true home, Buckingham Palace, and paying me substantially for the pain and suffering a quarter of a century of subway rides must have caused.  Sometimes I hope I will go through a delayed puberty and turn into a werewolf (they’re all the rage now!) or shed my good-girl image with a stint as a Vegas showgirl. I’m constantly looking for my next adventure and movies are the perfect inspiration.  Still on my To Do list is time travel, then an inter-galactic experience that involves astronaut ice cream (that stuff is surprisingly delicious).  After that, who’s storyline should I steal from?  Maybe a couple rounds in the ring like Rocky?  Leave a comment below letting me know what role you think I should play next and – fingers crossed – I’ll be brave enough to try it. L.T. P.S.  As I’m sure you’ve realized by now, my last post was an April Fool’s Day joke.  So, to all the potential suitors out there, don’t you worry!  I’m still significantly closer to a life of solitude (well, not totally alone – I have my cats!) than I am to marriage.   

It’s MY Turn (Said in Creepy Black Swan Voice)

About three months ago I left New York to go on an adventure.  I imagined myself starring in my own coming-of-age movie that involved long road trips (kind of like Thelma and Louisebut without the whole murder/suicide thing) and the occasional rugged man who would help me fix the flat tires that inevitably accompany cross-country journeys.   I figured I would be meeting new people, trying new things and would eventually find my true calling.  Being that I had no idea what that calling was, my luggage was similar to an abandoned costume chest you might find on an old movie set.  I have pirate shirts for my sailing adventures, hiking boots for my 127 Hours–inspired excursions and an extensive spandex artillery just in case my “true calling” turns out to be as a crime fighting superhero. 

Now that it’s my turn to be the heroine I’m discovering that my role isn’t fully developed; I’m a little all-over-the-place.  One second I want to be a professional athlete and then the next I’m watching a late-night infomercial and seriously considering purchasing a portable deep fryer.  Sometimes I want to be this strong, independent woman and other times I want to wake up to a letter from Columbia Presbyterian Hospital saying there was a terrible mix-up 25 years ago and I was actually switched at birth.  The hospital is flying me to my true home, Buckingham Palace, and paying me substantially for the pain and suffering a quarter of a century of subway rides must have caused.  Sometimes I hope I will go through a delayed puberty and turn into a werewolf (they’re all the rage now!) or shed my good-girl image with a stint as a Vegas showgirl.

I’m constantly looking for my next adventure and movies are the perfect inspiration.  Still on my To Do list is time travel, then an inter-galactic experience that involves astronaut ice cream (that stuff is surprisingly delicious).  After that, who’s storyline should I steal from?  Maybe a couple rounds in the ring like Rocky?  Leave a comment below letting me know what role you think I should play next and – fingers crossed – I’ll be brave enough to try it.

L.T.

P.S.  As I’m sure you’ve realized by now, my last post was an April Fool’s Day joke.  So, to all the potential suitors out there, don’t you worry!  I’m still significantly closer to a life of solitude (well, not totally alone – I have my cats!) than I am to marriage.   

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Making Movie Magic of My Own Exciting – no, thrilling! - breaking news coming from the world of EPIX.   Yes, it is a bit personal but I feel wrong not sharing this with all of you, my loyal readers.  Derek, EPIX’s amazing Producer and the love of my life, has finally proposed to me after nine long months of dating.  It all started back in July when we went to Comic-Con.  As we navigated the crowded convention hall together I knew that there was something between us – something so much more than just a superficial working relationship.  We tried our best to keep our feelings for each other under wraps while in the office, but with a magnetic connection like ours it is nearly impossible to deny our feelings, regardless of our surroundings.  Luckily for us we were sent on a bunch of assignments together including press junkets for The Next Three Days and Rabbit Hole.  We also went to the red carpet premiere of The Last Airbender and Why Did I Get Married Too? but it wasn’t until after I heard him chuckle at the most inappropriate time during a screening of For Colored Girls did I know for sure that he was The One for me.   Sitting through Jackass 3Dand Buriedwith him have been some of the best hours of my life, and I can’t wait for the lifetime of movies ahead of us. We haven’t set a date yet but you can bet your bottom dollar that the wedding will be EPIX-themed, red carpet and all!  L.T.

Making Movie Magic of My Own

Exciting – no, thrilling! - breaking news coming from the world of EPIX.   Yes, it is a bit personal but I feel wrong not sharing this with all of you, my loyal readers.  Derek, EPIX’s amazing Producer and the love of my life, has finally proposed to me after nine long months of dating.  It all started back in July when we went to Comic-Con.  As we navigated the crowded convention hall together I knew that there was something between us – something so much more than just a superficial working relationship. 

We tried our best to keep our feelings for each other under wraps while in the office, but with a magnetic connection like ours it is nearly impossible to deny our feelings, regardless of our surroundings.  Luckily for us we were sent on a bunch of assignments together including press junkets for The Next Three Days and Rabbit Hole.  We also went to the red carpet premiere of The Last Airbender and Why Did I Get Married Too? but it wasn’t until after I heard him chuckle at the most inappropriate time during a screening of For Colored Girls did I know for sure that he was The One for me.   Sitting through Jackass 3Dand Buriedwith him have been some of the best hours of my life, and I can’t wait for the lifetime of movies ahead of us.

We haven’t set a date yet but you can bet your bottom dollar that the wedding will be EPIX-themed, red carpet and all! 

L.T.

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Jokes On You In the spirit of tomorrow being April Fools Day, I thought I would write a blog dedicated to all of the films that have a major “whoopsie!” moment.  The movies that slowly and carefully lead us, the viewers, down a deliberate path and then BAM the jokes on you and nothing is as it seems.  Like in Brotherswhen Natalie Portman’s character thinks that Tobey Maguire is dead as a doornail.  She moves on with her life and snuggles up to his brother, Jake Gyllenhaal (can’t say I blame her) but then, WHAM, Tobey is back from the dead and slightly irritated that his kid brother is encroaching on his turf.  Or in Desperately Seeking Susan when you’re thinking “oh wow, Madonna is so cool and original” and then all of a sudden – POW! - she has a doppelganger in the form of Rosanna Arquette.  Or Hot Tub Time Machine where John Cusack and his group of friends are middle-aged and resigned to having a mediocre life, then BOOM they all get a second chance and Lougle is born.  Or Shutter Island where, let’s face it, the joke is on Leonardo DiCaprio and not us.  Leo is a U.S. Marshall one second and then KAPOW, he’s just as coo-coo crazy as the bald lady in the loony bin.  Don’t even get me started on The Usual Suspects. So, what films have thrown you for a loop?  The Sixth Sense, Fight Club and The Game are just a few more that come to mind for me.  Oh, and Finding Nemo. L.T.

Jokes On You

In the spirit of tomorrow being April Fools Day, I thought I would write a blog dedicated to all of the films that have a major “whoopsie!” moment.  The movies that slowly and carefully lead us, the viewers, down a deliberate path and then BAM the jokes on you and nothing is as it seems. 

Like in Brotherswhen Natalie Portman’s character thinks that Tobey Maguire is dead as a doornail.  She moves on with her life and snuggles up to his brother, Jake Gyllenhaal (can’t say I blame her) but then, WHAM, Tobey is back from the dead and slightly irritated that his kid brother is encroaching on his turf.  Or in Desperately Seeking Susan when you’re thinking “oh wow, Madonna is so cool and original” and then all of a sudden – POW! - she has a doppelganger in the form of Rosanna Arquette.  Or Hot Tub Time Machine where John Cusack and his group of friends are middle-aged and resigned to having a mediocre life, then BOOM they all get a second chance and Lougle is born.  Or Shutter Island where, let’s face it, the joke is on Leonardo DiCaprio and not us.  Leo is a U.S. Marshall one second and then KAPOW, he’s just as coo-coo crazy as the bald lady in the loony bin.  Don’t even get me started on The Usual Suspects.

So, what films have thrown you for a loop?  The Sixth Sense, Fight Club and The Game are just a few more that come to mind for me.  Oh, and Finding Nemo.

L.T.

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This is Awkward… Ever catch a preview for a movie that makes you cringe but you can’t put your finger on why?  Then finally you realize, it’s not the plot or the script, it’s not the camera angles or the lighting – it’s the cast.  Like Bad Teacher, for example; the upcoming film that stars Cameron Diaz and Justin Timberlake who seriously dated for years and are now, apparently, such functional exes that they can co-star in a movie.  Awkward turtle.  But at least they’ve had a few years to get over everything – think of all the couples that dated during a film’s production and then broke things off.  Being a real-life duo is all footloose and fancy free while you’re filming, but try going through an entire press junket with an ex.  Yuckies.  Then there is the uncomfortable “bitch stole my script” moment when two movies that are freakishly similar come out at the same time.  Like what’s up with Black Swan’s Natalie Portman starring in No Strings Attachedand Black Swan’s Mila Kunis starring in Friends with Benefits (which also stars Justin Timberlake – I’m starting to sense a theme).  I mean, did they not discuss their next projects while working together?  Do you think they got mad and forced their respective leading men, Ashton Kutcher and JT, to give each other hunky-man dirty looks or did they chuckle and say things like “oh, silly Hollywood executives!”  Or, best case scenario, maybe they just ignored the whole situation until after the films were released and said something like “oh, you did a movie about f*** buddies?  Weird, me too!” But these are all silly inconveniences compared to the Mac Daddy of awkward situations – co-starring with your ex’s new significant other.  If I could just be a fly on the craft services table during the filming breaks of The Lincoln Lawyer… Lord only knows how Ryan Phillippe, my boyfriend, dealt with being around Matthew McConaughey, my ex!  Honestly, sometimes I think my life is morphing into a Nora Ephron screenplay. L.T.

This is Awkward…

Ever catch a preview for a movie that makes you cringe but you can’t put your finger on why?  Then finally you realize, it’s not the plot or the script, it’s not the camera angles or the lighting – it’s the cast.  Like Bad Teacher, for example; the upcoming film that stars Cameron Diaz and Justin Timberlake who seriously dated for years and are now, apparently, such functional exes that they can co-star in a movie.  Awkward turtle.  But at least they’ve had a few years to get over everything – think of all the couples that dated during a film’s production and then broke things off.  Being a real-life duo is all footloose and fancy free while you’re filming, but try going through an entire press junket with an ex.  Yuckies. 

Then there is the uncomfortable “bitch stole my script” moment when two movies that are freakishly similar come out at the same time.  Like what’s up with Black Swan’s Natalie Portman starring in No Strings Attachedand Black Swan’s Mila Kunis starring in Friends with Benefits (which also stars Justin Timberlake – I’m starting to sense a theme).  I mean, did they not discuss their next projects while working together?  Do you think they got mad and forced their respective leading men, Ashton Kutcher and JT, to give each other hunky-man dirty looks or did they chuckle and say things like “oh, silly Hollywood executives!”  Or, best case scenario, maybe they just ignored the whole situation until after the films were released and said something like “oh, you did a movie about f*** buddies?  Weird, me too!”

But these are all silly inconveniences compared to the Mac Daddy of awkward situations – co-starring with your ex’s new significant other.  If I could just be a fly on the craft services table during the filming breaks of The Lincoln Lawyer… Lord only knows how Ryan Phillippe, my boyfriend, dealt with being around Matthew McConaughey, my ex!  Honestly, sometimes I think my life is morphing into a Nora Ephron screenplay.

L.T.

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